Friday, 20 April 2012

How to compliment a lady

Travelling to the Burlington Hotel in Birmingham today to meet some Birmingham Singles looking to join RSVP, I was very happy to receive a compliment from a guy on the train. It really made me smile and it brightened my day. So, for the rest of the journey I was left pondering on the best way to deliver a pleasant compliment to a lady. It's a problem often put to RSVP's dating coach, Stephanie Robinson.

Of course, we all know men and women's brains are wired differently and what seems like a perfectly logical compliment from the guy's point of view can quickly turn sour when interpreted by the lady. So what is a man to do? How is he ever meant to get it right?

Well, a recent survey by a health care provider has suggested that one of best, sure-fire ways to compliment a lady is by making a comment that suggests that she has lost weight. I have to say, I agree wholeheartedly with this, if it comes from someone I know. A simple "you're looking very trim in that outfit" would definitely lift my day. However, be warned; avoid saying that a lady "looks well". It is a comment that I have heard more than once and I immediately think you are saying "you've put a bit of weight on". And the survey suggests that I am not the only one here - so be warned!

Another safe bet could be to make a positive comment about how they are looking - for example you could say that you like their smile or eyes. Although don't do what my husband did when he first met me and ask if they are wearing coloured contact lenses. I am sure he was well-meaning, but I wasn't impressed! Other sage areas for you to try could include mentioning the colours they are wearing or the outfit they have chosen. At the end of the day, we like to know that we are looking good today and made the right choices about what to wear!

Looking at a recent Yahoo survey, the best compliment voted on by their readers was "Are your feet sore, because you have been running through my mind all night". A great line, but I'd say this was a pretty risky strategy. I know that a man who makes you laugh can be very attractive, but you don't want to be labelled as a "player" used to delivering slick and insincere comments to lots of ladies. And you are definitely not being funny when you say "You are not as stupid as you look" - but I know you wouldn't say that, would you?

Having said all of this and made you feel nervous about saying anything to me when we meet, I must say that the best advice I can give the men out there is not to be put off from making a compliment just in case you get it wrong. When someone else tells you that you look good, it can do wonders for your self confidence and always makes you smile. Just take a second to think about what you are going to say first - and how it could be interpreted - before you actually say it! It might be logical to you - but will it come across that way?

1 comment:

  1. Well, it's a fair point about the coloured contact lenses, but what I *meant* to say was that your eyes were *such* a vivid colour, that surely that vividness couldn't be 100% natural. Thinking about it, I see what you mean! Guys, we're doomed.


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