Friday, 18 January 2019

Ditch your dating bad habits to find love this year

Here at RSVP Dating agency and singles club, one of the things that we often hear from our many success stories is that, aside from the events or the introductions where they met their partner, the biggest takeaway for them was the advice and support that they received from our experienced team of matchmakers.

Like all parts of life, when it comes to dating and developing relationships we can develop bad habits and, most of the time, we don’t even realise that we have fallen into these, until we take the time to sit down and honestly look at how we conduct ourselves on dates or the issue is raised constructively by a third party, such as our knowledgeable matchmakers.

Why not start 2019 off with a new outlook on love and dating and ditch the 6 most common dating bad habits that people fall into?

1.       Being too hard on yourself

It is human nature to indulge a little negative self-talk every once in a while, but, when it comes to dating, it can really hinder the experience for both yourself and your date. When the capacity for negative self-talk becomes too harsh and critical, it blocks you from being able to relax and enjoy the dating experience; become so self-conscious that it is impossible for your date to see the real you behind all the tension and anxiety. You become convinced that as soon as your date sees the real you, they will run for the hills. But what you don’t realise is that negative self-talk is putting up barriers and blocking your date from seeing all the things that make you you. Whilst anxiety before a date is natural, don’t let the negative self-talk stop you from shining through and enjoying the moment.

2.       Having unrealistic expectations of your date

Let’s face it, from the moment you read the profile of your match, you begin to construct a mental picture of what they are going to be like. But the issue arises when you live for the fantasy of that person rather than the reality and you start daydreaming about the first meeting, the first kiss and even the wedding. If you find yourself rereading every message looking for information that supports the fantasy you have created, I can guarantee that when you finally meet that person in real life, you are going to be disappointed, not because they are a bad match, but because the fantasy person that you have built up in your mind is not real and no person, no matter how amazing, will be able to measure up. Instead, be open-minded; don’t read something into everything and, who knows, you might be pleasantly surprised.

3.       Trying to be something you are not

When a member joins RSVP dating agency, often their number one reason is because they have tried other dating methods and formed relationships that have ultimately been forged on lies. People often employ slight exaggerations of the truth and little white because they do not believe they are enough as they are. They believe they’re harmless and will never be discovered. But the truth always has a way of coming out. The little white lies may impress in the beginning, but all you are doing is stopping the person you are dating from seeing the real you. No healthy long-term relationship can survive on a foundation of dishonesty. Do you really want to spend the next fifty years of your life pretending to be someone you’re not to impress a date? Or would you rather be yourself and find someone who likes you for you?

4.       Using dates as a form of therapy

Dating can be tough; there’s no denying that, particularly if it has come as a result of some emotional pain. Finding yourself in a relaxed environment with someone who seems caring, gentle and kind can prompt the floodgates to open for some people. However, just as you don’t want to take any baggage into a new relationship, you don’t want to open the floodgates on a date;  it leads the other person to feel more like a counsellor than a potential partner and can stop things from developing further, as they feel you are not ready.

5.       Complaining

People with a positive and enthusiastic attitude towards life are more attractive and, even though things may go wrong, they don’t usually let them ruin their day. Some people, however, have developed the habit of complaining and will complain about everything from the traffic to the service and the food and they may not even be aware that they are doing it. If you find yourself complaining a lot, make a conscious effort to focus on the positive and the things that you are grateful for. It will make you a happier person and a better date.

6.       Bad manners

Make a habit of having good manners in all aspects of dating - reply to correspondence; thank someone for a date even if you don’t want to see them again; if you have made the decision to not take it any further, let them know and wish them all the best for their dating journey. Most importantly, be civil and courteous to all people.

By changing some of these most common dating bad habits you will find that, rather than feeling despondent and exasperated with your dating journey, you will start to relax and enjoy the experiences it brings about.

If reading this you have found yourself recognising some of the traits in you and you want to ditch the bad habits to find love this year, why not meet with one of our experienced dating consultants to find out more about how we can help? Contact one of our lovely team today to find out more.

Friday, 4 January 2019

2019 - Is A 'New You' Really Needed?

Many people make New Year’s resolutions, such as to lose weight, join the gym, learn a new language, or to find a partner...everybody’s lists vary. We are inundated with promises of a 'new year and new you' by advertisements on television, through to our social media feeds and others around us, with plenty of promises that ‘2019 will be your year’. I definitely believe it can be, if you choose to go about it the right way!

At Dating Agency and Singles Club RSVP, we always have an influx of people enquiring to join over Christmas and New Year. Whilst it is always good to see a new calendar year as time for a fresh start and be inspired to set new goals, it goes without saying that you have to be realistic to make it past January. Signing up for the gym with the view to going 3 times a week won’t make you lose 2 stone in 3 months, if you don’t actually attend the gym. A New Year’s resolution isn’t completed by one act or impulse; you have to continually put the effort in to see the results. The same thing can be said for dating.

What we would suggest is to start small and to be kind to yourself along the way. If 2019 is the year you want to kick start your dating journey, joining RSVP is a great first step. In addition to the many benefits of our dating agency, there are different membership packages you can choose from. For example, you could become a Singles Events member and aim for one of our fabulous singles events each week. Whilst we are happy for you to attend more, we believe it is good to start small and build yourself up. Or, if you are looking for Introductions and need more support on your dating journey, we would recommend our Platinum Introduction Agency membership, where you have your very own Dating PA who can support you through your dating journey, making it easier for you to succeed.

Finally, there are two things everyone can do that often get overlooked when dating.
  1. A positive and open-minded attitude will help you in your dating journey the most. Not only will it offer more opportunities; it can help you enjoy yourself more along the way.
  2. Be realistic in who you are, what you have to offer, what your expectations are and how you can move forward.
To get your 2019 dating journey under way, simply provide a few details about yourself and someone from our friendly team will give you a call.

Thursday, 20 December 2018

Every Date is a Good Date or a Good Story

The other day, I heard someone say ‘every date is a good date or a good story’. This, on the whole, I think I agree with. At RSVP Dating Agency and Singles Club, we are keen for our members to simply get out there and date. Many of our members have said that, before joining, they hadn’t dated for years or haven’t got far with dating on their own. Some people worry about dating again; after all, the dating landscape has significantly changed in the last few years. That is where we are confident our services may help you get back out there!

As we have mentioned in previous posts, dating is undoubtedly a numbers game: the more people you meet, the more likely you are to find your one. When you join RSVP, all of your introductions are hand picked, either by our team of expert matchmakers or, for Platinum members, by your Dating PA. These matches are based on criteria agreed with you at interview, whilst taking in to account your personality type and preferences. We encourage you to meet as many people at possible, whether it is through introductions, or at our singles events. So, our advice to you is simple: relax, it's only a date; it isn’t signing your life away to someone! Say ‘yes’ to as many dates as possible. Whilst this may be daunting to you, perhaps it might be helpful to consider that the person you are dating could feel the same.

We always find that people with an open and relaxed attitude find someone faster. If we have a member who is unsure about going on a date introduction, we always remind them that the date could have many outcomes. Firstly, the best outcome would be you have met someone you really like and you could live happily ever after. Or the date could be a couple of hours out of your life with someone who isn’t suitable for you, but has a sibling or friend who is ideal!
Are you ready to get back out there and start dating in 2019? Simply provide a few details about yourself and one of our friendly team will get in touch to arrange a meeting with one of our Dating Consultants. 

Friday, 16 November 2018

Dating doesn't have to be risky business

At RSVP Dating Agency and Singles Club, we know how exciting it can be when you are starting to get to know someone new and eagerly anticipating that first date. But, it’s equally concerning that the person that you are going to meet may not turn out exactly as described. We’ve all heard the horror stories of those first dates that didn’t quite go to plan - where the person they were meeting wasn’t who they portrayed in their profile; or they turned out to be already in relationship and only looking for one thing; or where things have taken a sinister turn when the person in question put too much trust in a stranger. So why do so many of us put ourselves at risk for the sake of finding love?

RSVP's expert dating consultants hear these horror stories over and over again and it always makes us wonder why more people don’t opt for a safer way of finding love. Traditional methods of making sure people know where you are when heading out on a date and checking in regularly are good practice. There are also new apps for those going dating, with built-in features for safe zones, check-ins and panic alarms to keep your loved ones up-to-date and sure that you are safe. But, I can’t help but feel that we don’t put enough emphasis on personal safety.

I am all for safer dating and anything that assists us in staying safe in a world full of hidden dangers. In life, what’s free is generally free for a reason: there’s a trade-off. Free dating is free because there’s no-one checking the person you are meeting really is who they say they are; there’s no-one ensuring that the person you’re chatting to on a site isn’t a criminal in some far-off land. Much better in my book is to invest a little in your own safety up-front so you do not have the fear of what could go wrong on that eagerly-awaited first date. By using an accredited professional matchmaking service like RSVP, you can be safe in the knowledge that whether you are heading out on a date with your own hand-picked introduction or attending one of our hosted singles events, people you meet have been met personally by one of our expert dating consultants and that they have agreed to behave accordingly.

Why not let our expert dating consultants put your safety first and introduce you to other like-minded, single people who have been vetted and approved to join our exclusive dating agency and singles club with one goal in mind – to find the one. If you would like to find out more about our services and how we work, contact our friendly team today.

Friday, 19 October 2018

Does age really matter when it comes to relationships?

When it comes to dating, there are a few unspoken rules about what is and isn’t an acceptable age gap between partners. Dating someone who’s your age and a few years older or younger is seen as normal. Dating someone who is more than a decade younger than you, you’re seen as a cradle snatcher. Dating someone who’s considerably older than you, your actions are seen as less than innocent.  But despite all of the unspoken rules, does age really matter when it comes to relationships?
At RSVP Dating Agency and Singles Club, age is something that is discussed on a daily basis. When our experienced Dating Consultants meet with new members, they work with them to set out their criteria including the age ranges that they are looking for but they also know that at the end of the day, age is just a number.
We have so many success stories where members have set their age range for potential introductions but then attended one of our hosted singles events or received an introduction and proceeded to spark up a relationship with somebody who is older or younger than the age they specified – and most of the times they would never have been able to tell if we hadn’t informed them of the age.
Over our 26 years, we have learnt that age; just like height, dress size and distance, really is just a number. When it comes down to it, if everything else fits the bill do you really want to turn down the chance that they could be the one, all for the sake of a number?
At RSVP, we take a holistic approach to dating and look at each member and potential match on a whole rather than just focusing on specific details. Whilst age is a factor in the matching process, learning from experience our matchmakers know that the age of a person doesn’t just come down to how many years they’ve been alive, it comes down to your mental age, energy levels and health, your lifestyle and most importantly your outlook on life. At the end of the day if you meet someone who matches up to all of these, surely that is more important than dating someone who fits your age criteria but nothing else.
If you would like to find out more about our services and find out how our expert Dating Consultants can find the right match for you, then contact us today.

Friday, 5 October 2018

A Flash Back to The Early Days of RSVP

Not many people realise, when enquiring to join RSVP Singles Club and Introduction Agency, that we have running for 26 years. Over this time, the dating landscape has undoubtedly changed significantly. However, what people are seeking remains the same. It goes without saying, that they are looking for 'their one'.

RSVP is a well established, traditional Dating Agency, that has successfully built up a large database of lifetime members. We offer both specialist matchmaking and singles events. We have proudly helped create countless happy-ever-after stories; take a look at some of the many RSVP success stories.

Over the 26 years, we have seen plenty of dating agencies, dating apps and dating websites come and go. We want to be known for being the introduction agency that really cares about our members. We care if you were on your own last Christmas, New Years Eve or Valentine’s Day. We not only strive to help you find that special someone, we also hope to get you out and about and meeting other members.

We send out a seasonal quarterly singles events calendar to all our active members. In the early RSVP days this was just a printed sheet of events each month. Obviously now, emailing is an important and efficient form of communication for us. Members can browse, view and book all of our upcoming singles events online. However, it is still important to us to produce a calendar for members to read through at their leisure and not have to rely on a wifi connection. The quarterly calendar we currently produce is now professionally printed and in colour - oh how times have changed! Over the years, RSVP singles events have become more frequent and we have learned the types of things our members enjoy doing. We also listen to your suggestions on things to try, too, and often include these.

When RSVP was born, the internet was in its infancy and RSVP operated differently. However, the aims for both the members and the RSVP team of matchmakers remain the same.

Thursday, 30 August 2018

Why you should say yes when we phone you promoting an RSVP event

RSVP Dating and Singles Events members often receive a friendly call from the team to try and persuade you to come out to our events because we know it is such a great way to meet potential new partners. For some of our members, the thought of it can be a bit scary initially. But in our experience, those that get the best from their membership are the ones that see events as a win:win situation – they may not meet the “one”  - but they are sure to have some fun!

Remember that seemingly unrelated and inconsequential encounters can have a great significance as you pursue your dreams. You might not meet the partner of your dreams at your first RSVP singles event - though there are plenty of RSVP success stories where that has happened - but you'll surely make some more friends and they may know someone who might be just right for you.

In today’s world of instant gratification and microwave popcorn, we need to take more time to focus on persistence while we remember that those things that happen easiest or fastest are often not the best.

So bear in mind, when you are attending RSVP singles events, that you should make an effort with how you come across to other members. Don't come straight from the gym or garden. Wear something relaxed but that shows that you have made an effort.

And keep the conversation light. Avoid politics, previous relationships or how you felt about matches you've met with RSVP or the length of your RSVP membership and refrain from any complaints and comments on how your life might be better.  When you are smiling and having a good time, you are much more attractive to others than when you are venting.

You want to make sure you are really focusing on the positive outcomes and do your best to push the negative out of your mind. The positive thoughts will make you much more receptive to experiencing positive feelings. Then you will start to relax and enjoy yourself.